Taking A Lesson From

“The Wooden Bowl”

September 2, 2010

“Resolve to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of the weak and the wrong. Sometime in your life you will have been all of these.” ~ Dr. Robert H. Goddard

Recently, a friend of mine lost his father. His dad had reached a fairly old age and his children bore him many fine grandchildren. But, this was the first time my friend and his siblings have encountered the loss of an immediate family member. There was, of course, some anguish. And, while the loss was anticipated, I believe it came much sooner than they thought. It always does.

From the day we are born, we are on a course toward death. Hopefully, we can make it out of the world at a ripe old age with dignity and grace. And, if the powers that be shine on us, perhaps we’ll be surrounded by loved ones when old age looms large.

I keep a note pad on my reading table where I make a list of things I need to do. (Because I’ve reached a certain degree of age where keeping lists is a must!) On my most recent list is a notation to send a special note to two elderly aunts living in Virginia. I loved these women very much in my childhood but time and distance drew me away. A few days have passed and I still haven’t crossed this matter of correspondence off my list.

I’ve written on these hallowed pages before of my opinion of chain e-mails. BUT, as I have said before, this one bears an audience much larger than my e-mail contacts would allow. And, as usual, the author of this composition is nameless, which is a shame. I am sharing it with you gentle readers. I know, I know…maybe you think it’s a cop out for lack of original editorial material. I don’t much care. I think this particular missive is one that deserves to be read, not by just me or my friends and family but by everyone who flips to this page in FOCUS. (Pssst . . . pass it on!)

And so it goes:

“The Wooden Bowl”

A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and 4-year-old grandson. The old man’s hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered. The family ate together at the table, but the elderly grandfather’s shaky hands and failing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor. When he grasped the glass, milk spilled on the tablecloth.

The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess. “We must do something about father,” said the son. I’ve had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor.” So, the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner. Since grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl.

When the family glanced in Grandfather’s direction, sometimes he had a tear in his eye as he sat alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food.

The 4-year-old watched in silence.

One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly, “What are you making?” Just as sweetly, the boy responded, “Oh, I’m making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food in when I grow up.

The words struck his parents so that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done. That evening the husband took Grandfather’s hand and gently led him back to the family table. For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither the husband nor the wife seemed to care any longer if a fork was dropped, milk spilled or the tablecloth soiled.

On a positive note, I’ve learned that, no matter what happens, how bad it seems today, life goes on and will be better tomorrow.

I’ve learned you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles 4 things: a rainy day, the elderly, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights. I’ve learned that, regardless of your relationship with your parents, you’ll miss them when they are gone from your life. I’ve learned that making a living is not the same thing as making a life.

I’ve learned that sometimes you get a second chance. I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands. You need to be able to throw something back sometimes. I’ve learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you. But, if you focus on your family, your friends, the need of others, your work and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you.

I’ve learned that when I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision. I’ve learned that even when I have pains, I don’t have to be one. I’ve learned that every day, you should reach out and touch someone. I’ve learned that I still have a lot to learn.

I’ve learned that you should pass this on to everyone you care about. I just did.

Truth is… I could not have written an original piece any better than that. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a couple of special notes to write.

Take care of yourselves and each other. Peace be with you!