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August 28, 2014

Um...OK, The Cameras Stink; Nevermind

Mineola, NY (AP) A suburban New York county is forgiving $2.4 million in speed camera fines issued in the past month.

Nassau County Executive Edward Mangano says there were problems with the cameras installed at six school locations. He tells Newsday that five cameras issued tickets on days when school was not in session. Cameras at a sixth location began operating prematurely.

Mangano says he is declaring amnesty on the fines. He says enforcement resumes when school opens next month.

Gov. Andrew Cuomo signed legislation this year allowing 200 new speed cameras at school zones in New York City and Long Island.

The cameras are supposed to operate during and immediately before and after school. The county issued more than 30,000 citations at the five schools, totaling more than $2.4 million.

Marshal Leaves Due To Altitude, NOT Due To Aliens!

Nederland, CO (AP) Nederland, Colorado’s town marshal says he is resigning after just six months because he can’t adjust to the altitude.

The Daily Camera reports Monday that Jim Matheney wanted to dispel rumors, including one claiming he left the job in the quirky town just west of Boulder because of a space alien attack.

Matheney, a former police captain in suburban Detroit, says he left because he could not acclimate to the 8,400-foot altitude.

Paul Carrill, a former Kansas City, Missouri, sheriff’s commander, is interim marshal.

The town, which has five officers and a sergeant, is also known for its Frozen Dead Guy Days festival, celebrating the corpse of a man who hoped to one day be revived.

Attempt To Save College Drinkers Hurts Violin Makers

Annapolis, MD (AP) Binge drinkers and frat boys aren’t the only ones despairing over Maryland’s new ban on grain alcohol: Violin makers who used the liquor to make varnish are also affected.

Silver Spring violin maker Howard Needham tells The Washington Post that nothing works better than Everclear grain alcohol for making the varnishes he uses to repair chipped or broken musical instruments.

He’s been hoarding whatever grain alcohol he can get his hands on since the ban took effect last month.

Other violin makers report similar concerns.

Maryland became one of several states to ban sales of alcohol at 190 proof or higher. Leaders at Maryland’s colleges and universities supported the ban, saying students abused grain alcohol as a cheap way to get drunk.

Duh, It Was Goldilocks! Case Closed By FOCUS Detectives

Farmington, ME (AP) The person who broke into an off-the-grid cabin in remote western Maine didn’t get away with money, jewelry or other valuables. Police say the thief took a pair of bear heads.

Franklin County Sheriff Scott Nichols says a Waterboro family reported last week that someone had broken into their cabin in secluded Alder Stream Township sometime over the summer.

Nichols tells the Morning Sentinel the family hadn’t been to the cabin since April, so the exact time of the break-in is not known.

In addition to the stuffed bear heads, the thief also made off with two lawn chairs and three flashlights.

The sheriff says the cabin’s futons appear to have been slept in.

The owner said the bear heads had been in the family for 40 years.

Moose Gets Stuck In Office Building For Six Hours

Berlin (AP) Maybe he got hungry?

A moose on the loose in the eastern German city of Dresden evaded capture before getting stuck inside an office building, tantalizingly close to the canteen.

A spokesman for Dresden police says the young bull walked into the building housing German industrial giant Siemens shortly before lunchtime Monday.

Marko Laske says officers and wildlife spent six hours trying to shoo the moose into a container but eventually had to resort to using a tranquilizer gun after he refused to follow orders. The animal, likely to have come from neighboring Poland, will be released back into the wild.

PA Woman Is Relieved To Get Obama Barack (Heehee)

Wilkes-Barre, PA (AP) Police have returned a life-size statue of President Barack Obama that went missing from its owner’s northeastern Pennsylvania porch and was found a few days later reclining on a nearby park bench with a six-pack of Twisted Tea.

The owner, Tiffany Bruce, says she was relieved to get it back Thursday.

The statue, purchased at a furniture store last year, depicts Obama smiling and sitting casually, his legs crossed and his right arm flung out.

Bruce decorated the statue as Santa Claus on Christmas and arranged pumpkins around him on Thanksgiving.

She says her five children love the statue, and she was startled enough by the theft to be hospitalized for a panic attack.

The furniture store’s employees had been planning to replace it with another statue for free.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


ARCHIVES:

August 21 - 86 Year Old Woman Writes Romance Novel

August 14 - Wanted: Serial Bank Robber With Questionable Taste

August 7 - Interrupting Lawyer Gets Rare Sanction

July 31 - Strip Club Endorses Pastor For Congress

July 24 - Man Starts Fire Using ‘Blowtorch’ To Kill Spider

July 17 - Great Fall Too Much, Humpty Dumpty To Be Rebuilt

July 10 - Performer Drapes, Lights Firecrackers On Body

July 3 - Good Samaritan Rescues Man From Burning SUV

June 26 - Firemen Rescue Man When ‘Lady’ Sculpture Traps Him

June 19 - Blind Man Hears, Feels His Way To Auto Mechanic Degree

June 12 - Drivers Gathering For Great Nebraska Tractor Ride

June 5 - Thief With Facebook Account Rats Himself Out

May 29 - Missing Pet Pigeon Flies To School Of Young Owner

May 22 - Testing Inconclusive, Suspected Bobcat Returned

May 15 - Rooster Prince George, At Dallas Hardware Store, Is Popular

May 8 - New Jersey Fire Siren Silenced By Osprey Nest

May 1 - New Jersey Tot Wipes Out Hours Of Monks’ Work

April 24 - Miss America: Don’t Suspend Teen Over Prom Invite

April 17 - Squirrel Blamed For $300K In Damage To Building

April 10 - Burglary Suspects Butt Dials 911

April 3 - Teen Says Typeface Change Could Save Millions

March 27 - Scrap Dealer’s Bargain Turns Out To Be Worth Millions

March 20 - City Considers Taking Ban On Spitting Off Books

March 13 - Gettysburg Wax Museum Selling Historical Figures

March 6 - Woman Gives Birth In New York City Crosswalk

February 27 - Wisconsin Rubber Duck Bill Racing To Finish Line

February 20 - Wait Till Santa See ‘Em! Reindeer Get Glowing Antlers

February 13 - NJ Festival Lets You Eat, Drink, Floss With Bacon

February 6 - Romance Sizzles At Bacon Fest As Couples Marry

January 30 - Man Shares Wanted Photo, And Cops Really LIKE Him

January 23 - Beloved Dog’s Ashes Returned To Owner After Two Years

January 16 - Colorado Gives Up And Renames Mile 420 Marker

January 9 - Brewery Responds To Starbucks Letter With $6 Check

January 2 - Atlanta Home Prompts 911 Calls With Fake Dangler

December 26 - Dog That Survived Gassing Headed To Rose Parade

December 19 - Tourist Distracted By Facebook Falls Off Pier

December 12 - ‘Cannibal Sandwiches’ Sicken Wisconsin Residents

December 5 - Topless Barber Charged With Unlicensed Cosmetology

November 28 - 852 Thai Children Set Human Christmas Tree Record

November 21 - Beagle’s Nose Predicts Few US Polar Bear Cubs

November 14 - NY Knish Factory Fire Leads To Nationwide Shortage

November 7 - Stolen Costumes + Craigslist = Not A Good Idea

October 31 - City: Odor From Sriracha Chili Plant A Nuisance

October 24 - Deadly Halloween Tableau Too Realistic For Some

October 17 - Abandoned Philly Prison Adds Screams For Halloween

October 10 - Indiana Dog That Crashed Half Marathon Gets Medal

October 3 - Naked And Scared Has Turned Into Semi-Clothed & Spooky

September 26 - Extra Weight Costs Bank Robber Swift Exit

September 19 - Russian Shot In Quarrel Over Kant’s Philosophy

September 12 - Art Heist Trial Help Up Over Lawyer’s Sneakers

September 5 - Marijuana Wrapped Arrow Shot At Squirrel?

August 29 - Hole Makes Huge Pumpkin Ineligible For Alaska Fair

August 22 - Prowling Ninja Says He Was Trying To Help Cops

August 15 - British Cats’ DNA Helps Convict A Killer

August 8 - China’s Heat Wave Brings‘Dead’ Man Back To Life

August 1 - Owner Could Face Charges For Venomous Snakes

July 25 - Swimmer To Go Alone Hauling 2,000 Pounds Of Brick

July 18 - Thai University Apologizes For Hitler Banner

July 11 - Winner Of The Cherry-Spitting Contest - BB Gun!

July 4 - Family Dogs Survive Close Call With Mama & Baby Bears

June 27 - ‘Here’s Looking At You...Officer!’ Man Quotes Bogart Upon Arrest

June 20 - "Happy Birthday To You" Copyright Suit Filed In NY

June 13 - Nude Revelers Greet Popular Tourist Train

June 6 - ‘Bucket List’ Item Leads To Women’s Arrest

May 30 - Swing Dance Your Way To Class Credit

May 23 - NH City Sues Parking Meter “Robin Hoods”

May 16 - Critter Cams Provide Peek Into The Lives Of Bears

May 9 - OMG - The Sun Is Shining! School Closes For Nice Weather

May 2 - Cartel-Linked Man Arrested On The Dance Floor

April 25 - Oregon Juror Jailed For Texting During Trial

April 18 - What’s That Sound? Court Screeners Find Pet Duck In Bag

April 11 - Goat That Walked Into Bar Was Taken From Zoo

April 4 - Man Accused Of Using Fake Penis For Drug Test

March 28 - Caretaker Charged With Taking Care Of Old Whiskey, Too

March 21 - Crime Doesn’t Pay #1: Thief Returns Money From 1980s

March 14 - People, Pooches Team Up To Fight Flab At Gym

March 7 - 37-Pound Tubby Tabby, Biscuit, In Need Of Home

February 28 - Shoeshine Man Donates $200,000 In Tips

February 21 - 911 Call Asking For Cigarettes Leads To Arrest

February 14 - Mistrial Declared When Prosthetic Eye Pops Out

February 7 - Snoozing Judge Sent Home For Nap


 

 

 

 

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