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I Don’t Know...What Do You Wanna Do?

September 4, 2014

There is a conversation that occurs over a thousand times on any given weekend. It takes place between hundreds of people of different cultures and races all over the world. It is safe to say that, unless you are not of this planet, you have at least overheard and most likely participated in what may well be the most universal exchange of dialogue ever spoken. (Now there’s a weird contradiction). It is also the biggest waste of time and the stupidest, most mindless use of any language. And it goes something like this-

Person 1 says- “Hey, it’s cool to finally get to hang out.”

Person two replies- “Yeah, I know. I been looking forward to this all week.”

Person 1 responds- “So let’s do somethin’.”

Person 2 fires back- “Yeah, we should really go do somethin’.”

Person 1 ponders- “So…What do you wanna do?”

(Wait for it, wait for it.)

Person 2 replies- “I don’t know,” (here it comes), “What do you wanna do?”

Arrrggghhh! OK, a show of hands; how many of you know exactly what I’m talking about? More importantly how many of you almost involuntarily raised your hand?

Now to be completely honest, we’ve all used this asinine response at one time or another. You probably more than me, but that goes without saying. Yet in all the times we’ve let this idiotic phrase slip from our lips, we never once truly thought about how pointless it really is.

The question posed is “What do you wanna do?” and our programmed response is “I don’t know. What do you wanna do?”

Did it ever occur to anyone, that if the first person had any idea of what they wanted to do, they wouldn’t have asked what the second person wanted to do in the first place? What purpose does it serve, to ask someone, who has already openly established that they don’t know what to do, what they wanna do? Since they don’t know (which they’ve already made quite clear if you had paid attention) the only logical thing for them to do is to say that they don’t know again and once again return the “wanna do?” back to the second party. (Are you keeping up with this?) At which point the second party, who has also stated their lack of knowledge in matters of what to do, responds once again with the phrase that set the whole thing into motion in the first place. It’s like playing ping pong with a bowling ball underwater. How much time have you yourself wasted playing this verbal game of tag?

There is no end-all solution to this particular problem, but here are a few suggestions to maybe help things along.

1. Tell your friends they suck and that you don’t want to play with them anymore. It really is much easier to plan for one and you’ll definitely get to do what you “wanna do”...unless it’s tennis.

2. Plan ahead. Have some sort of game plan or agreed upon destination before your company arrives.

3. When they ask what you “wanna do?” suggest something they hate. This will get them to decide on something quicker to avoid the dreaded activity.

4. Do nothing. Nobody said that when you have friends you actually have to do stuff with them. It never hurts just to hang out.

5. Start doing something on your own. Maybe they’ll join in; even if they don’t at least you’re not bored.

6. Kill the neighbor’s dog. Nothing’s more fun than improperly disposing of a dead animal with friends; you can have a little funeral and…whoa, what the heck were we talking about again…oh yeah.

7. Have a copy of FOCUS handy. It is always full of places to go and events happening in your area. Thus there’s no excuse of ‘nothing to do.’

So you see there is really no reason to waste countless hours of your life debating over not knowing what to do.

I welcome almost all questions and comments either through FOCUS, or E-mail me directly at wanderingchainsaw@gmail.com or FRIEND me on Facebook under Saw’s Brood.

Hope to hear from ya, until then try and stay focused. See ya!

This is a SAW Classic! Chainsaw will return next week with all new wisdom and insanity.
~ Editor

 

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