LIFE SENTENCE

June 24, 2010

I am not happy! Though it’s almost certain happiness is whirling around in the emotional blender of my mind (sometimes I impress myself with those nifty metaphors.) Searching thru the extensive mental emotional-thesaurus and finding that impatiently frustrated is a suitable summary for the current mental state. Impatient for… frustrated by… not exactly sure “what,” which at least explains the frustrated part of it. Seems this may be just another level in my own private self-induced personal hell.

Hell- now there’s an interesting subject on which everyone’s opinion is diversified. The standard religious standpoint on hell (with slight variations depending on the denomination) is a horrible place of fire and torment where the wicked go when they expire. In most cases it involves spending an eternity in a lake of fire. Some believe you will burn according to your sin. In other words, if you steal a pack of gum you wouldn’t burn as long as, say, Hitler or Michael Landon. However, the Bible does basically say sin is sin, so it looks like burning for eternity all around.

Sounds pretty bad to just keep on burning like that, but there are worse things. What if the “lake of fire” is just a metaphor? Maybe those biblical scholar guys just didn’t have the knowledge to explain it. So they summed it up with the worse thing they could imagine.

What’s worse than burning for eternity, you ask? Think of the worst thing that has ever happened to you. Flash back to the lowest, most depressingly depraved moments in your life. Now can you imagine reliving not only the event or moment, but the emotions that were tagged to them, over and over again? Here’s the scariest thought of all: what if we’re already in hell? Would that be so hard to believe? Wouldn’t the ultimate torment be to be being tormented and not even know it? Hell that’s confusing!

Depending on your perspective, life could indeed be a living hell. Whether it is or not, we are all living out a life sentence in the most high-level prison facility to ever exist, with no chance of early release or parole. Welcome to planet Alcatraz. Doesn’t it feel that way sometimes? When you’re at work slaving away, earning just enough to stay alive, but, never enough to enjoy life that often. We work five days to earn a living and have two days to actually live; literally living for the weekends. You only have one life to live and you waste 85% of it to have 15% to call your own. Who came up with this asinine division of time? Most likely it was the guys who live 85% of the time and spend the other 15% on the golf course.

It’s our own fault you know. Much like the living hells we put ourselves thru. We the people are consumers and we must have stuff. We worry more about pointless, material crap we could do without than we do in having a place to call home where we could store all that crap. Don’t believe me? OK, how many of you rent? Whether it’s an apartment, trailer or even a house, it will never be yours. Hey, at least you don’t have to mow the grass, or worry about plumbing repairs; but you do have to ask permission if you want to paint a friggin wall. I digress, maybe there are some advantages to being able to come and go as you please and let someone else take care of “your place” while you do more important things, like watch sitcoms or surf the net for more stuff to buy. My gawd what am I getting at here? I’m not really sure but I’m getting impatient for this to come to some conclusion. It’s all so frustrating. Ahhhh!

Life isn’t hell; it just sucks most of the time. We can’t take anything with us when it’s over and nobody gets out alive anyway. So f*** up as little as possible, laugh every chance you get, and find joy in even the stupidest moments, because we only get to do this once.

I welcome almost all questions and comments via through the Focus, or e-mail me at chainsawo53@aol.com. Hope to hear from ya, until then try and stay focused!