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Happy USED Year?

January 5, 2017

Shalom and good tidings unto you dear reader; welcome to 2017. We will not waste time belittling your intelligence or lying to you by wishing you a universally standardized, not to mention over used, over rated and all too common “Happy New Year”… because it’s not. Wait…not what? We used like a bunch of adjectives there, so what is it not? Adjectives aside let’s FOCUS (shameless plug) our limited attention spans on the “happy” the “new” and the “year” parts.

Well it is a year, there’s no denying that. 365 days have gone by and we’ve run through the cycle of the seasons. So it is indeed “another” year; according to the human races perceived definition.

The happy part would be debatable, depending on the emotional status per individual. Of course since the “Happy” is being wished upon you, (rather than being a proclamation of your current demeanor) your current happiness is irrelevant. So it is safe to surmise that, despite your possible crappy mood, we could wish you a “Happy Year” and that’d be okie dokie fine. However the “New” is highly questionable.

Seriously, other than the alteration of one digit on the calendar what’s “new” about it? How will this year be “new”? How will it be any different than the one that came before it or the one that will come after? You probably looked at and will look at them in the same light. Do you think the “new” implies the chance to begin anew? That it will provide a plethora of opportunities for newness? Well, unless you’re a newborn you’ve already got a few “news” under your belt and the olds don’t appear to have produced any significant news or newer news. You’ve still got the same status quo; same position in society, same struggles, same joys, same heartaches and same old you.

However, there is still hope because they say: the more things change, the more they stay the same. So if you’re still the same then things have changed…right? But if nothing ever changes would that mean that nothing is ever the same? Like life is somehow just an ever-changing, repetition? Wait! So now you’re pondering how can something be repetitive if it’s ever changing? Well if it’s ever changing, then the constant change would eventually be repetitious. Life is recyclable. Anyone who comprehended the “circle of life” speech in The Lion King understands this (and if you didn’t…hakuna matata). There is nothing new to be found here on planet Earth, regardless of the human races decreed time frames. We take the old, reshape and mold, making it into something different, never something “new.” But if nothing is ever new, how can anything be different and can anything ever be new?

We’re going to stop here because we have dug a psychological hole so deep this writer can no longer see daylight. Seriously, when you start quoting Mustapha it’s time to quit. Though it would be remiss not to point out that the fertilizer that a decaying lion’s body produces is in no way equal to the number of antelopes said lion devoured whilst still alive. Which is perhaps a discreet way to point out that the circle of life is unbalanced and tilts the scales to those in power. Now before we go off on a tangent about how recycling applies to different social classifications let’s return to the subject at hand- the NOT New Year.

It’s just the same thing all over again only marked by the passage of time and a new calendar. Which is not really new just different from the tree it once was… which was just dirt before. Hmmm now there’s an interesting thought everything is just different forms of dirt. So if you get dirty are you growing or evolving? Anywho...

Same s*** different date! You’ll get up at the same time, go to work at the same time. You’ll eat, sleep, weep, celebrate and live pretty much the same as last year.

Unless you are a hobo. Then you never know what’ll happen tomorrow. Being a hobo seems like a spontaneously fun career choice. But hobos aside… Happy Different Year, Happy This Year, Happy Another Year, Happy Completed Cycle of the Seasons…Year (that last one would be a b**** to fit on a greeting card). We can’t logically call it new but at least the “happy” is consistent. So embrace the happiness in life as the year begins. What will be new is what you choose to do with it.

Next week: A true tale of horror as the cat comes back!!!

I welcome almost all questions and comments via FOCUS, or email me at wanderingchainsaw@gmail.com or you can FRIEND me on Facebook under Saw’s Brood!

Hope to hear from ya, until then try and stay focused. See ya!

 

 

ARCHIVES:

No. 52

‘Twas The Night Before KRAMPUS

It’s The Thought

You Are Nothing More Than A Disgruntled Who!

It’s such a good vibration...such a sweet CESSATION!

A Warm Helping Of Frigid Poultry

Patridiocracy

Dungeons And Dragons And All Things EVIL?

Old Man Chainsaw

Helloween 4: What Are You Afraid Of?

Helloween III: Tot vs Monster Under The Bed!

There is nothing to fear but fear itself… and BEARS! ALWAYS FEAR BEARS!

One Last Razzle Dazzle Smokin’ Hail Mary Pass

Life’s Mysteries Lying
Within The Windowsill

Time Flies When?

The Other Birthday Party

Across The Rainbow Bridge

Ten More Uncomfortable Questions?

The cReAtURe

Bemusement Park Attraction

A Passing Interest In Political Masonry

Gotta Catch 'Em All?

Tis The Wink Of A Breath

A Darker Shade Of Summertime Blue

Still Littering?

H2-Oh How Fire Works

Pessimistic Optimism

Disclaimation

The Pover-Ties That Bind

Zombisaurus Rex

Apocalypse...right now? Congratulations, You’ve Survived The Apocalypse!

Where The Wild Things Were

A Hundred Thousand To One,& Eleven Things I Will Never Write

Selfie-Centered Society

Well...

Who Paints The Hammers?

Open For Interpretation

YOLO But SODOI

FUN TYme ? of TRiViAL! wiF John Q.

I Ain’t Afraid Of No Ghost... Busters...Remake?

Springing Forward To The Past

Remember: ‘Funeral’ Starts With FU!

Deadpool Vs. Chainsaw

Revealed Carry

One Man’s Trash Is Another Man’s Trash...But Sometimes It’s Collectable Trash

Timeless Testing

Definitively Undead

Do You Want To Psychologically Deconstruct A Snowman?

powerBALL $1.5 Billion You’ll Never See, or A Really Powerful Ball

Heading For A Eulogy

Resolution Resolvent

Wondering Around Wandering

X-MAS

The GHOSTS Of Christmas Present

Happy Hellidays A special hate the holidays rant

Tis The Season

Franks-GIVING

Memoir From The Soviet Union

The Incredible BULK

Requiem For A Deer

Hell-O-Ween 2015 Chainsaw vs The Devil

Hell-O-Ween 2015: Trick or Treating With John Q

Hell-o-ween 2015 Trap Door To Hell

Hell-O-Ween 2015 The Absence of Light

HELL-O-WEEN 2015 • There is nothing to fear but fear itself? Actually, there’s way more!

Gone Squirrelly

Close In-Counter The Crooked Man

Chainsaw’s Guide To“Fun”damental Gun Safety

Older And...Wiser?

So...You Want Me To Put It... On The Dash?

Acts Of Lethargy

High Noon In The TempleOf The One-Eyed God

What’s Wrong With This Picture?

A Part Apart

Chainsaw’s Guide To Handgun Safety

.38 Special

Littering In Review!

5

Preparing To Alienate Yourself

Father’s Day?

We Are All Immortal... At Least Until We Die

Boggin Me Down

Comic Relief

5 Minutes Later...

Godzilla Was Misunderstood

Happy Bunnies’ Last Stand! Or, The Rise Of The Content And Yet Paranoid Squirrels!

Smurf The Whole Day Through!

Running With Scissors

Back In 5 Minutes...

We’re All Mad Here!

Building Up To It

Graveside Trivia With Frank

Before You Can Begin Sifting Through The Ashes

Daylight WASTE Of Time

Just Thinking Out Loud Here

There’s Bacon Loose In The Freezer

Stop Thinking Like A People

Sit, Roll Over, Play Dead...Now, Reanimate

Of Chainsaws And Puppy Paws

Cult Classic Or Pop Culture Corpses

A Chainsaw Classic:Exhaustipated

Living Within The Sliding Puzzle

Resolutions In Higher Resolutions

2015 As It Falls Apart

It’s A Wonderful Life?

How The Grinch Didn’t Bother Stealing Christmas

Room To Move: A Christmas Story

10 Uncomfortable Questions

Thanks...For Nothing

All In Due-Over Time

Stuff To Give Thanks For, Because After All, It’s Thanksgiving

30 Days

Hell-o-ween 4 Do You Believe In Ghosts?

Hell-O-Ween 3: Suburban Legends

Hell-O-Ween 2 The Bloody ‘55

Hell-O-Ween - There Is Nothing To Fear But FearItself...And Low-Flying Ducks!

Why Would You Want To Catch A Cold?

Technologically AdvancedOr Obsessed?

The Chainsaw Hard Drive

Of The Apes

I Don’t Know...What Do You Wanna Do?

And Then...One Year Later...

Is It Hopeless Or Should We Hope Less

Are There Alternate Realities?

Questionable Perception

Literally Speaking

He’s In The Closet

The Eclector

Littering Is Delusional!

Sis Boom BAH

Fear...Of The Bat!

CLOSED The Road To Imagination

Toy Box Terrors

Fire Trucks, Some Fencing And A Potential Kazoo

Grasping For A Gasp

Commercial Messages

Lilies Considered

The Passage Of Furry Little People

Broken Conversation Pieces

Momentary Lapse Of Realization

During The Zombie Apocalypse

And You Can Drive It Off The Lot...TODAY!!!

Th-th-that’s Not All, Folks!

Relation Termination

Bound & Determined

Waste of Saving Time

They Oft Go Awry

SELF LAMBASTING

Mud and Memories

The Devil Came Down, Part 2

The Devil Came Down

Chainsaw’s Random Trivia Tidbits Or Useless Crap You Probably Don’t Know

Undead Offensive

Estranged Stranger

The Wee-wee Hours Of The Morning

Trying To Stay Focused

Annual Demise

‘Twas The Night Before Santa Claus Was Coming To Town!

Slay Bells Ring

Embracing The Holidays...In A Strangle Hold!

The TRUTH About Thanksgiving!

Stuff To Be Thankful For, Because After All, It Is Thanksgiving

Used Children

Primitive Mind Set

HELL-O-WEEN 4 THERE IS NOTHING TO FEAR BUT FEAR ITSELF…AND BIGFOOT WITH HERPES!

HELL-O-WEEN 3: Co$tumes

HELL-O-WEEN 2 Is It The Devil’s Holiday?

Helloween Left In The Dark

To The Naked Eye

Something Else

Trivia To Soothe The Savages

MOTOSIERRA, SCIE à CHAîNE, ??????, ERRA ELéTRICA, Αλυσοπρ?ονο, CHAINSAW

For Decades

Lights... Camera... Distraction

Webster’s DictionaryThe Chainsaw Edition Vol. 2

Webster’s Dictionary THE CHAINSAW EDITION, Vol. 1

You Only Get One

Picture Imperfect

Can You Imagine Dragons?

Putting The ‘Itch’ In

Grow Up!!!

Night of the Living Dead...Alligators?

Littering Is Still Bad!!!

Zoo-Illogical

Bulimic Nation

Warning: This Article May Contain Nuts!

Distractions

A Better Mousetrap

A Little Soul-Rending

Life

The Battle En...Shoes?

Americana Forgotten! A Train Of Thought Ride

The Evil Dead

Shooting From The Hip

Reminiscing A Dump...Truck

Another Good Friday

Political Race...ism?

Seven Stages

The Joke

THE BEAR AND I Part 2: RETURN OF THE Q!

The Bear And I

Scouting It Out

Chainsaw’s Dating Guide


 

 

 

 

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