A Very Swiney Christmas
December 19, 2013
‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through
Not a piglet was snoring, not even Little Ben.
Master’s darned socks hung on the fence in disarray
In hopes that Mighty Swine was on his way.
The night air set chilly as the piglets all slept
While visions of vegetables danced in their heads.
Fiddling with the last of the day’s many chores
I had just hung mistletoe over the French doors.
When out in the barnyard arose a loud sound
Startled, I jumped ten feet off the ground.
Darting to the front window, sliding the last few feet
I peered through the glass to take a quick peek.
Moonlight cast long shadows from barn to pig pen
Giving the impression things weren’t as they had been.
Then what to my burgeoning eyes did I see
A colossal bucket of mud; how could that be?!
A Billy goat was driving, perched high on a ledge
Teetering and tottering right on the edge.
Escorting and guiding the huge wooden tub
Were pot-bellied pigs splattered in mud!
Now, Babe! Now, Wilbur! Now, Piglet and Miss Piggy!
On, Hamm! Oh, Porky! On, Pumbaa and Wiggley!
To the side of the barn, to the pig pen we go
Go with corn, go with carrots. Go! Go! Go!
Over the gravel they trudged tugging on the great tub
Ooey-gooey sloshing sounds coming from the mud.
Walking out on the porch as they passed my front door
I couldn’t believe my eyes; that’s for dagnabbit sure!
As I turned to grab my camera and capture the occasion
I caught sight of Mighty Swine…man, he weighed tons!
Startled, he grunted deep down in his throat
Yet, dashing was he in a red velvet topcoat.
A burlap sack was slung across his broad back
It was brimming with mouthwatering piggy snacks.
His eyes were quite beady, yet twinkled so bright
With a hint of a glimmer that flashed in the night.
He grinned an enormous, happy, toothless grin
Showing off the hairs on his chinny-chin-chin.
His red hat askew, was tilted slightly to the right
And appeared to be one size too tight.
His mammoth belly filled out his red fuzzy suit
Yet he was quite dapper, all the way to his boots.
He appeared a jolly fellow, in spite of himself
I almost expected him to be accompanied by elves.
Toward the barn he trod, then glancing my way
He paused just an instant, like he had something to say.
Yet, not a noise he made as he dashed around the barn
Well, waller with pigs, he’s right at home on a farm!
First he set about grubbing the pig’s long trough
Then he started filling each stocking with slop.
Finished, his entourage gathered around the great tub
Then hoisting himself he sat down with a loud thud.
The tub rocked side to side and I thought it might topple
But the mud just sloshed and nary spilled a dropple
Then I heard him oink loudly as they went out of sight
Merry Christmas to all, and to all piglets good night!
Merry Christmas Everyone!
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