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Extreme Makeover: My House

April 7, 2016

Wowzer! Where is Ty Pennington when I need him? Dickens, I’ve been renovating, repairing and building a cat condo ever since mom decided to move back to my humble abode. Happening as fast as a fresh coat of primer dries I have literally transformed my home to accommodate my parents. Yeppers, next week I’ll be saying, “No, I don’t live with my parents. My parents live with me!” and how happy we will all be. Dad, as you know, moved here last June and resides in the apartment upstairs. My wonderful Mother will join me in the big house where’s there plenty of room for her and her three frolicking felines. Hence the cat condo...technically a screened porch which I absolutely love!

Incredibly it all started when mom put her place on the market at 10am and it sold by 4:30 that afternoon. Suddenly my peaceful existence was cantilevered out of control. Secretly wishing for Ty to appear and wave a magic makeover hammer and “poof” didn’t happen. So I picked up my tape measure, a carpenter’s pencil and sketched out a list. Let’s see...apples, almond butter, bread...oops, wrong list!

For starters, I decided on a new kitchen floor since mom requested the cat condo have a vinyl floor I found this marvelous marbled tile pattern about 50 shades lighter than what I had and will attempt to install Friday. (The old linoleum has been repurposed in the screened porch.) Gina is coming to help so it’ll be too much fun. Although she admitted, “I don’t know how to put down a floor.” No worries I told her...neither do I. Friends, this is going to be awesome!

Speaking of lighter, the new pattern is so much brighter I’m considering putting in a wash station outside my kitchen door. Then when Mud Puppy comes in after playing in rain muck I could rinse her clean before she places one of her cute little grubby paws on my new floor. Actually, it probably needs to be an undercarriage washer...she only gets muddy from the belly down. (Totally adorable until she decides to shake it off.)

Double dickens, I almost forgot! After eleven years I finally painted my ghastly wooden ceiling. I’ve disliked it ever since I moved in. Why? Because who in their right mind would put real wood on the ceiling and fake wood, as in Pergo, on the floor? Obviously they clashed. Besides, knotty pine is by far not my favorite color. (Neither is plaid.) Seriously though, I’m not a squirrel yet I felt like I was living in a tree.

Ah...but now I have a gorgeous (and I do mean gorgeous) white ceiling with just enough woodgrain (barely) perceptible to give it character. Can we say feng shui everyone? Or course, I had reinforcements who thought we were moving furniture. When I mentioned painting the enormous ceiling they were not amused. However, in the spirit of letting moi do the dirty work... wa-la...several hours later the darkness lifted. My daughter said, and Gina agreed, it looks like a beach cottage. Oh my, I need to rush out and buy a palm...or two...or three!

On a roll, I decided to paint the laundry room in anticipation of the new washer and dryer being delivered. I gotta tell ya, the first time I used the washer it was eerily quiet. My old one sounded like a rocket taking off. (Obviously in serious need of life support. In reality though, my house is 118 years old and there isn’t a level floor or plumb corner anywhere and honestly, I wouldn’t have it any other way.) Yet, half a dozen loads later I’ve gotten used to not checking to see if it’s still breathing.

Hmmm...a few last minute touches and everything will be ready for mom. Then I believe I’ll take a much needed, long awaited, relaxing beach vacation...but first I need to build a wall in the garage. Oh, and then there’s the back patio to put in. Oh, and deck boards to replace. Oh, and then I still need to...

Can you imagine...if Mud Puppy wasn’t muddy?

Smile, it’s a gorgeous day in the neighborhood.

CanYouImagine@charter.net

www.Facebook.com/BobbiGspeaks

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